Extempore Effusions on the Completion of Masechet Sukkah

If you’ve fallen asleep in the nude
But have not said Shma, don’t be lewd.
Just poke out your head
From your canopy bed
(This sugya is not for the prude.)

A student of Hillel of fame:
Yonatan ben Uzziel was his name.
When he learned, when he read
Any bird overhead
Would spontaneously burst into flame.

Said the flesh-and-blood king’s servants: “See,
At the customs house, don’t pay the fee
For you are the king
You will get everything!”
Said the king: “They’ll learn morals from me.”

“The exilarch stole my sukkah,” she screams,
Says Rav Nachman, “that’s just how it seems
Put your head in a bag
You crazy old hag
You’ll get recompensed just in your dreams.”

“Hadar” – what does it mean again?
“It’s HaDIR,” Rabi said, “a sheep pen!”
As a pen has much sheep
So Hadar, in its keep,
Has big / small / blemished women and men.

This sugya’s about “number two”
For what is a person to do
When he goes on Shabbat
Can he carry, or not?
Just three stones may be brought to the loo.

Rav Kahana liked often to roam
On Friday, while mi b’od yom
“Surely they’ll save me a dish
Of leftover fried fish.”
But not so! What’s the moral? Stay home!

(45a — Tosafot)
How to rejoice with the groom?
Ride in on a horse to the room
And start a big fight
With the friend to your right
‘Til he topples head-first to his doom.

Can it be that a woman and man
Walk together with no caravan?
Is he only her friend?
Is she chaste to the end?
Said Abayey: “I don’t understand!”

Woe to the goyim, it’s true
For what are the goyim to do?
With no temple, no altar
For penance, they’ll falter —
Thank goodness God made me a Jew.

When a king makes a feast for a few
He cooks many big pots of stew
But he says, “Just one dish
For my love, for I wish
To think not of the food but of you!”

I hope I managed not to wreck it
It is quite a lovely masechet
So I’ll say the Hadran
And with pleasure move on
To go learn about Tiltul and Leket.